"how do people dance sexy in clubs?"
- Question submitted by Anonymous
Dannielle Says:
This is how I dance:
The eye contact and smile is what really kills it, bc then everyone knows you’re having fun. I think a good way to start dancing sexy is to isolate, move just one part of your body, like this:
Hips = great choice. Also, get on YouTube and look up dance moves. Practice ONE COOL MOVE over and over, you can just sort of move your shoulders a bit and then bust this out every so often:
When all else fails… INVOLVE YOUR FRIENDS —
good luck!
Kristin Says:
The fact that you have come to us for lessons on sexy dancing is PRETTY incredible. That either means that you truly believe that we can dance sexily and/or teach others how to dance sexily OR that you want to stand in solidarity with two people who are as foreign to sexy dancing as they are to understanding calculus.
If you REALLY want to dance sexy in a club, my advice is to clamp on to another person like one of those teddy bear backpacks, but on the front, and just hold on while they move. Why does it have to be your responsibility? PUT IT ON THEM.
If you want to stand in solidarity with fellow humans who do not sexy dance on purpose (who can help an occasional accidental sexy dance, right?) — then here we are, with you. Dance using Dannielle’s aforementioned steps, and become an instant heartbreaker.
ALSO, NEWS ALERT, BREAKING, THIS JUST IN. SEXY DANCING UPDATE 2014:
“I NEED TO LEARN HOW TO DANCE FOR HOMECOMING?!?!?!?!?”
- Question submitted by Anonymous
Dannielle Says:
OH GOD. ISN’T THAT SORT OF SOON? WHEN IS HOMECOMING.
*googles darren’s dance grooves video*
You can do a few things.
1) Get a friend and learn a few swing/shag dance moves (from the internet?)… Those are ALWAYS fun to pull out at a dance, and you look really professional, but all you do is hook your arms together twice… it rules
2) Jump Dancing – for fast songs, just jump up and down and close your eyes and bob your head… if you’re having fun, no one cares what you look like.
3) Funny Dancing – this includes moves like the Robot, the Cabbage Patch, the Running Man, Crypt Walking (poorly), the Lawn Mower, the Sprinkler, the Shopping Cart, etc.
4) Shy Dancing – standing in a group of friends and not really moving your feed, but swaying your shoulders and head back and forth very gently.
5) Don’t thrust your pelvis and you’ll probably be fine.
Kristin Says:
Does anyone actually ever learn how to dance? Besides professional dancers and Natalie Portman for that movie with the dead swans?
If you meant dancing to fast songs, I think the key here is not in learning actual DANCE moves, but just slowly working up the nerve to move as you want to move and not caring what other people think. It’s like… I just jump around and bop my head and mostly look hilariously funny and ridiculous, but SO DOES EVERYONE ELSE.My friends and I used to play a game where we would all impersonate our friends’ dance moves, AND IT WAS SO FUNNY BC WE ALL HAD VERY SPECIFIC RIDICULOUS THINGS WE DID. WHO CARES. YOLO. ETC.
If you mean slow dancing, that is a cakewalk. Just get really close to and wrap your arms around a consenting person and then sway until the song is over.
Moral of the story: The less you THINK the better you’ll DANCE.
Also, I do agree that when all else fails you can just do the Robot and the Sprinkler, get some punch, repeat…
