You know when you go out against your will and you’re like ‘ugh, i really don’t wanna be out right now, i HATE dancing, i don’t like these people THAT much, drunk girls are dumb, i have homework to do, my head hurts and i just wanna be asleep’ AND THEN… your mothereffingJAM comes on (probably SINCE U BEEN GONE) and all of sudden your left arm goes up in the air, your jaw drops to the floor, your eyes get the size or grapefruits, the upper half of your body leans back, and in no time you’re doing this weird crab dance b/c you don’t GIVE A FUCK WHAT PEOPLE THINK B/C IT’S YOUR FUCKING JAM THIS IS KELLY WHY DOES NO ONE UNDERSTAND!?!??!!

Well, this is a lot like your life right now. I mean, let’s be real, this is a lot like everyone’s life before they figure themselves out. You’re going to feel these feelings again. If you decide ‘NO I DON’T WANT TO DANCE’ and you leave the bar, no matter where you go… SINCE U BEEN GONE is going to play again before your life is over. It’s going to play more than once, and eventually you’re going to jam the fuck out.

You can’t help how you feel, 21yearoldfemalestudent, but you CAN help what you do about it. You can try and suppress your feelings all you want, but they’re going to come back. The longer you try and pretend your feelings aren’t there, the harder they’re going to be to deal with.

Also. Why would you deny yourself the opportunity to love someone? Love is the most beautiful, fascinating, breathtaking, mind-blowing, nerve-wracking, nail-biting, wonderful experiences that life has to offer. Don’t pass it up just because you’re scared. Fear vs. Love, y’all.

btw. i’m totally going to start referring to ‘boning’ as ‘jamming out’

If anyone has ever wondered why Dannielle and I work so well together, it is because that is literally exactly what happens to my body when Kelly Clarkson plays.  #shegetsme

In other news, yes, figuring out that you may be gay is a lot to handle.  You have probably always seen your life a certain way…maybe a husband, a few kids, a couple of houses and an indoor swimming pool.  I am not sure how that imaginary life looked, but since it is imaginary, I’m really hoping you included the indoor swimming pool.  The hard truth of it all is that it was only imaginary.  You cannot know what your life is going to look like before you live it, and so the only advice we can give to you is to stop fighting those feelings, and start trying to accept them.

You may fall in love with a woman who then cheats on you with a married woman whose husband takes solace in your understanding, so then you start boning the scorned husband and accidentally get pregnant and you keep the baby, but you resent the ex-husband so you leave him and move to a farm where you meet the woman of your dreams, and you raise your baby and adopt a dog and grow tomatoes and buy a swing for your porch.

Stop trying to figure out where to put the swing on your imaginary porch, and start at the part where you follow your feelings and kiss that first girl.  The rest will follow, and there is no stopping any of it.  Try to find people who can help you adjust to these new feelings, but don’t bury them.  Take it one day at a time, and send us an email when you kiss that girl and are like, “HOLY BALLS I AM STILL NOT TOTALLY SURE I CAN DO THIS BUT WHEN DO I GET TO TAKE HER CLOTHES OFF?!?!”