"HOW DOES ONE GO ABOUT KISSING SOMEONE?? INSTRUCTIONS/TIPS PLEASE & THANK YOU."
- Question submitted by Anonymous
You don’t necessarily HAVE to wear chapstick, but if you’ve been hyperventilating for an hour before you allow your guts to let you kiss a human, your lips and mouth will probs be dry so drink a water and put on chapstick is tip one.
Tip two is start slow. I’ve been in situations before where both parties are STOKED and also NERVOUS and it turns into a clustermouth of humans banging teeth and drooling. Which, hey, if that’s what you’re into it… AY OKAY, but a lot of people aren’t. Go slow and pay attention to what their mouth is doing. Don’t think about what you’re doing, just find places in their mouth where your mouth might fit comfortably.
When you’re using your tongue, please remember it is in the mouth of a human being. Your tongue is not a paintbrush, and the opposite mouth is not a wall which must be primed in under 20 minutes.
Make it your goal to feel every part of their mouth with yours. The rest will start to make sense.
When we started writing advice, Dannielle would always just squeal in embarrassment when it came to talking about mouths or boobs or any kind of sexitimes. Now she’s all ‘your tongue is not a paint brush.’ #proud
Instructions on kissing someone, by Kristin Russo:
1. Tell them you are going to kiss them. This breaks the proverbial ice, let’s them prepare so they don’t accidentally duck and cover or recoil in a panic and bang their head on the kitchen cabinet or whatever I don’t know where you kiss. Plus, it’s sexy. “Hey, so, I am going to kiss you now.” COME ON.
2. Kiss them on the mouth like a nice, calm human who just wants to be close to another nice, calm human. You have to start SOMEWHERE, people, so don’t attack with the force of a thousand Shanes. Just enjoy yourself for a moment and let THEM crank things up a notch.
3. Allow, respond and initiate in equal measure. Remember how I just said ‘let them crank it up a notch’? That’s you allowing the kiss-ee some room to be all OH SHIT WE ARE KISSING I LIKE THIS LET’S KISS MORE. Then youuuuuu respond and kiss back a little more which is YOU saying OH SHIT YOU’RE RIGHT WE ARE KISSING AND I TOTALLY WANT TO KISS MORE. Maybe then you initiate a different kind of kiss to change it up — maybe you are no longer thinking about this list because btw you will get to a point where you don’t need a list.
4. Breathe. Even if you are making out like the world is on fire around you, no one says you can’t pull back for a minute and be all, ‘Oh, hey.’ *winky emoji, embarrassed face emoji, dancing lady emoji* I promise that if you take a breath and look at the human whose mouth you are mashing, you will still get to kiss more, as much as you want, etc.
I think you asked for instructions on how to kiss and I accidentally gave you instructions on how to make out.
PS: Here’s a great gif series on how NOT to kiss, in case you were wondering.
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