advice, everyone is gay, gender, gender expression, hair, haircut, identity, intersectionality, kristin russo, lgbt, lgbt advice, non-binary
"Do I have to cut my hair short to be genderqueer? ‘cause I really like my long hair."
- Question submitted by Anonymous
Dannielle Says:
no? yes? I dunno, I’m not friends with the genderqueer police.
Here’s what I think about identity…I don’t get it… I don’t understand the need for a label, I don’t understand the need for a gender and a sexuality and how those things correlate, I don’t understand why we all constantly fight about the ‘right way’ to be a certain identity. I just don’t get it. I think, the way you identify is the way you identify, regardless of the way you look or act or smell or poop. You are who you are because that is who you are… right?
The fact of the matter is, every word associated with identity has about 4 million different definitions. I know that we perceive certain identities a certain way, but when it comes down to it, nothing is black and white and however you identify is correct. What matters most is how you feel. If you feel comfortable and confident in who you are, who cares what you call it, ya know? If anyone questions you tell them to come and talk to me… *makes mean face*
Kristin Says:
Dude. No. NO YOU DON’T HAVE TO CUT YOUR HAIR TO BE GENDERQUEER.
I’m sorry for yelling. It’s not meant to scold you it’s just that… well, it’s just that I wish that it was made clearer to all of you out there that identity is something that is personal to who we are and how we feel, and not affected by the way we present or what other people perceive of us.
Now, sure, I make jokes about my proclivity for cats and converse in relation to the word “lesbian” and that I date ladies… but I am also fully aware that the word “lesbian” doesn’t quite sum me up, and that if I wore different shoes and didn’t like animals, I could still like ladies just as much.
Genderqueer means different things to different people, but ultimately what we are talking about is the fact that the labels of GIRL and BOY don’t make sense to you or how you feel in this world. Which makes sense to me because GIRL and BOY are, in many ways, just made-up labels themselves. The length of your hair ain’t got nuthin’ to do with it.
Plus, Jesus had long hair and was totally gender-queer.
(Leviticus 14)
(Totally Kidding)
(Everyone Calm Down)
(Happy Friday)
