"I want to come out as bi but I’m only 14 and people might think I’m confused. Should I come out now or wait a while longer?"
Question submitted by youdontknowwhoiam124
The fact of the matter is, people “might think you’re confused” regardless of your age. I have friends who figured out they might be gay when they were 28 and people asked if they were sure they JUST HADN’T FOUND THE RIGHT GUY… This is real life, people.
It sucks because some of the world is super accepting and supportive. HOWEVER, another large part of the world sees your being bi as something DIFFERENT, which means, while they might not think it’s the worst thing in the world, they still want you to know there is an option to NOT BE THAT WAY.
It’s a little effed up, yea, but I think it happens to all of us regardless of age. If you feel comfortable enough to come out, I think you should. You don’t come out for people around you, you come out for you. That is what is important here. There will be questions / concerns / comments from people, sure, but keep in mind that YOU know yourself. Even if your mind changes in 15 minutes, this is exactly who you are right now. This is not a phase, you are not confused. You are you.
Dannielle skewered the heart of that matter really well: you come out for you.
We are two grown-ass ladies and we can tell you that we know for a fact that your identity when you are 14 years old is just as valid as your identity when you are 35 years old. Sure, maybe I have some more life-experience than I had when I was 14, and maybe I view the world differently because of it, but that does NOT invalidate who I was at 14. At all.
It sounds to me like you want to come out, and that you are feeling very sure about who you are — so I would encourage you to tell whomever you want, however you want. Even if your identity changes a bit as the years go by — that does not reflect poorly on you, or mean that you were ‘wrong’ about who you are right now.
No matter who we are, the way we view ourselves and the world around us changes as time passes. This ‘phase’ bullshit is exactly that: bullshit. Growing, learning, expressing those views and feelings, that is life. It’s not a fucking phase.
Go get ‘em.
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