How do i come out to my family as bisexual with actions instead of words because I'm to scared to say it.
-Question submitted by Anonymous
1. Rousing family game of Scrabble (you won’t get any points on “I am Bisexual,” but I think they’ll get the point.)
2. Gift them This is a Book for Parents of Gay Kids, cross out “GAY” in sharpie marker and write “BI” and then circle all of the related advice questions inside of the book (spoiler: this is also a book for parents of bi kids). Bonus Points: Wrap it in newspaper clippings about famous bisexuals.
5. Write them a letter. This one doesn’t really have a JOKE component, I just think it is a great way to come out as anything because it gives you the space to say exactly what you want, and gives them the space to digest and process the information. Ya know?!
6. Gather them togetherfor a morning breathing session (it’ll be great, it’ll be grand) where you show them this GIF & explain how calming it can be to the central nervous system:
After they do that a few times, “accidentally” close that GIF to reveal this one:
Then, shrug and shout I AM BISEXUAL and do 16 jumping jacks. It will give you such a great story…
"I’m a trans woman, and in the wake of the election I’m finding it hard to be hopeful. Any advice?"
-Question submitted by Anonymous
Mey Rude Says:
Hey, honestly, I’m in that same scary, hopeless boat as you. But, the good thing about that is that there are a lot of us here in this boat, and while all of us are afraid of sharks and storms and jellyfish and waves, we’re also all together, and that makes us stronger. And while you and I might be really scared of the water and all the things in it, a lot of the people in the boat are a lot braver than us. A lot of them also have skills we don’t have. Maybe they know how to spot changes in the weather or how to patch up holes in the bottom of the boat. Maybe they know how to fight off dangerous sea creatures. Maybe they even know how to spot land and how to get us there.
Now, I’ve probably strained that metaphor about as far as it will go, but I hope you understand what I’m getting at. You’re not alone, we’re not alone, and we never will be. We’ll always have each other. A lot of trans women, and trans people of all kinds, are going to be banding together more now than we have in decades, because, honestly, the danger that faces us is greater than is has been since the days of Reagan and the AIDS crisis. Let me tell you something, though, when we come together, we are powerful as heck. We started the Stonewall Riots, that means the LGBTQ movement as we know it is because of us. We changed the way people look at gender and fashion and language. Shade, werk, yaas, read, all of that was us (and when I say “us” I mean specifically Black and Latina trans women in this case). Culture would not be the same without us. We are revolutionary, radical and resilient.
What’s more than that – and this is really good news – is that we have all of our allies. We have the people who love us and are willing to sacrifice in order to protect us. We have people who are fighting tooth and nail for us, and they’re not going to let this ship go down no matter what (there I am with that metaphor again). They’re already donating their time and effort and money to places like the Trans Lifeline, the Sylvia Rivera Law Project, the ACLU, Planned Parenthood and the Transgender Law Center in order to help us out. They’re already helping us to change our names and our documents, they’re offering us shelter in case we lose our homes, they’re offering us love and community and protection.
Also, to be completely honest, maybe my words won’t give you hope. I understand that. I’ve had a lot of hopeless days since the election. But even when I’m feeling hopeless I’m going to keep fighting until I get that hope back, and so are a lot of other people. And if you can’t have hope right now, that’s okay, the rest of us will hope for you. Soon enough of us will be fighting (whether we have hope or not) that we’ll make things better and it will be easier to be hopeful. This is something I believe with all my heart and know with all my soul.
Until then, though, it’s not going to be easy. I don’t want to give you unrealistic expectations for the next four or eight years. But I’m fine giving you hope, because no matter how small hope is, it isn’t unrealistic. It can’t be. It’s hope, and hope is literally magic. I told you I was done with the metaphors and I am. When I say that it’s magic I mean very literally that hope makes things that should be impossible possible. It changes lives and it changes the world. And so while it seems like these next four years are going to be impossible, as long as we have each other, as long as we have our allies and as long as at least some of us have hope, we’re going to keep on fighting and keep on moving forward.
If you’re feeling hopeless enough that you want to hurt yourself, please reach out to someone. You can call the Trans Lifeline at (877) 565-8860 in the US or (877) 330-6366 in Canada, the Trevor Project at 1-866-488-7386 or the general National Suicide Prevention Hotline for the US at 1-800-273-8255. The Trevor Project also has text and chat lines.
"Do you know any long-term relationships between bisexual women and lesbians? I keep trying to look things up on the Internet and all I see are articles about bisexual women and long-term relationships with men and while it's the Internet with not the most reliable statistics available, it's been making me feel worse about having the intense feels for this bisexual woman I am dating."
- Question submitted by Anonymous
Well, how about me and my wife, for starters…
Brooklyn Rooftop, 2010 (seven months into dating)
Austin Hotel Bathtub, 2016 (three years after getting married)